The JACKALOPE Threat

December 7, 1999 - A day that will live in infamy.

Picture of Jackalope in light brush Picture of Jackalope on grasslands High Grand Emperor Ralphable I has detected the Jackalope threat and has decided to declare war on this vicious but related species.  More closely related to hares than rabbits (thus the designation Lepus Temperamentalus), the threat comes from their carnivorous activities, especially for other types of lagomorphs, including Cottontail Rabbits.  Having discovered their natural territory, being the Great Plains area of North America, especially Wyoming, has not deterred Ralphable, the supreme commander of the grand rabbit army (at least in his own mind), in his decision to exterminate this mortal enemy.  Of course, Ralphable will accomplish this task while he is taking over the world.   [Enlist Here]

In reality, Jackalopism, is created by a naturally occuring North American disease in rabbits called papillomatosis, where certain growths caused by a parasite harden.  When such growths occur on the top of a rabbit's head, they may resemble horns, thus leading to the birth of the Jackalope legend.

Gary Larson's Rabbit Hold-UpNews Flash: [RP, near Douglas, WY] Ralphable's soldiers corner Jackalope sympathizers.

In a bold attempt, two human Jackalope sympathizers, disguised as stagecoach drivers for a historical site's ride, were detained by Ralphable's foot soldiers on Tuesday, February 29, 2000. They were caught smuggling Jackalope milk for sale on the black market to fund their terrorist acts against rabbits. Jackalope milk, being an extremely rare commodity, would have fetched a high price, thus funding many covert operations. Ralphable is quite proud that his soldiers intercepted the shipment and as a result, has bestowed citations of merit.

(Pictured:  Artist's rendition of the arrest)



For more on Jackalopes, I suggest the following:


Ralphable (RIP)Twixi-MonsterLucy-WabbitMarcy-WabbitWinston (RIP)RobertDonna
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